Just being random

It has been 3 years since my last blog update,
I wonder who will read my blog after so long,
Actually, I should have studied for my assessment by now,
Yet just being procasinating as always,
Having a glance back to my older posts,
Found myself indeed childish even at the age of 18,
Seriously OMG,
Have written a lot of nonsense,
Thought of deleting it but I  changed my mind afterwards as these are the footprints of my journey to adulthood ---- (ya~ adulthood, 21 years old now)

Wondering why I would invest such so much effort in decorating my blog when I was 16 (if I remembered correctly),
Quite satisfied with the outlook of my blog even there's been a while,
maybe the least perfection is that there is no song in my blog.... Perhaps something went wrong with the code... I dunno~

12/4/2015
1:11 pm (UK time)

Aware!

o!
I shouldn't accustom to this unhealthy habit,
Shit,
it's really so hard to quit
I have no qualification to play
Indeed,
you tear my heart into pieces
=`)
Thank guy,
you made me learn a lesson

成长中

十八岁了，
是时候学习独立，
我知道自己的依赖性很强，
有男朋友的时候，就依赖他，
男朋友不在的时候，就要麻烦我身边的朋友，
独立好困难，
好想一辈子都在别人的羽翼下成长，
但是我明白我不可以再这样下去，
过多几年，
就是要踏出社会的人了，
人心险恶，
你就以为帮你的人真的是那么多吗？

毕业了，
我没有后悔当初转来尊孔这个大家庭，
谢谢buddy们，
你们超强大的，
能忍受非一般人可以忍受的，
我知道我很白目，很善忘，讲话不用脑，
小姐脾气也很重，最重要的是我的性格很急，很冲动，
但是谢谢这五年以来，
你们一直为我所闯下的祸收拾烂摊子，
希望毕业以后，
还是有像你们一样的人，出现在我身边，
当我的保护天使

分手了，
我希望自己一个人，
也可以活得好好的～
不可以再恋爱了～
好难得有自由机会^^
我知道自己很不习惯一个人生活，
但是，
要做一名的21世纪女生，
就应该单身一回，潇洒一回，
不要再感情面前继续地卑微，
要知道，只要信心足够，
没有人可以不爱你～

秀玲，加油^^

aiyar~~~~~~~~

怎么自己会这样，

既然认定了，

就不应该啊~

为什么明知道是错的，

是不值得的，

是愚蠢的~

还要这样？！

吴秀玲，你超鸟的~

告诉自己，

双子座，除了刘志勇外，

几乎没有好的了~

秀玲你要做的事情

在 7/6/12 01:44开始,

停止和他信息了，

怎样都不要回！

你是可以的~

我的未来，

很简单，

做刘志勇的老婆，

做刘志勇孩子的妈妈，

做大家眼中的好刘太~

对，就只是刘太！没别的了

秀玲，

加油加油加油

Desmond Loh, I love you

学车三两记

十八岁了终于学车了~
但是学车还真的是，
超级无敌难学~

没有什么希望的了，
可以PASS就好
><"

friendship

what is the meaning of friend, best friend, blossom friend, friendship and a hi-bye friend,
sometimes, it mess me up,
when u treat he/she as your best friend, but in contrary they don't think so, maybe they just treat you as a normal, hi-bye and sometimes they might do something to insult you,




i thought 18 yrs old it might be happy and joyful,
but it is not as same as how i thought,
i dunno, maybe i just a negative thinker,
today i have fallen ill,
A called me, but she didn't mean to ask about my condition, and i thought she was,
but what she has asked was called me to bring to present of C to school by today,(LOL)
and totally ignore that i having a bad headache.
 Or she was thinking i was lying at her that I having a headache

Sometimes, in these cases quite heart sore one,
i do treat them as my best friend,
but they backstaired me at the back,
and even told these to others as many as they can,

i don't this is the way to treat a friend,
sorry, i can't accept of these deeds,
that did from my friend

=(

为什么自己总是那么烂，

我什么都做不好，

yangzijiangchou,nanguairenjiahuitaoyanwo...

lanlanlanwuxiulingnihenlan...

yexudangwoshitoumingde

duinimenduiwohuibijiaohao

=')

walao,怎么搞最近超级情绪化

walao,walao,walao!!!
最近这几天，或者说从十一月开始，
做事从来没有那么顺心过，
那些都是小事，我知道，
只是还是很不爽，
可能是大考症候群，
很多人很看好我，
我也希望有你们所想的一半，
但是自己的实力，究竟还是自己比较清楚，
我并没有这个能力，
我那么的烂，
一直以为通过努力就可以弥补我的不足，
但是，并不是所有东西努力的就会有成果，
再说，我不是一个能一直持续努力不会累的人，
很多人都认为，
我是个努力的女孩，
我知道，我不是。。。
不要一直赞我，我会有压力～

I'm ugly and I know

i hate myself,
my face like shit,
i dun understand the god why created a cacat person just as me,
maybe I'm the one of the failure creation of god,
and my only mission is to let others make compare,
and show them how wonderful they are....
ahix~ i starting to hate myself.
 =`(

the ugliest

xiuling 

contradiction

finally i got some breath to update my blog,

recently i was busy with the my society thingy and nevertheless is my SPM,

i got back some of the trial paper,

hopefully, the result is quite ok to me, but the Science result is a little disappointed

but however i was just finished a set of science paper yesterday,

and luckily i grabbed a little bit confident from there~=)

i wish i can achieve the target that i have gave to myself....

and for some of my friends who really try so hard for the SPM i wish u luck...

majority of u feel that I'm getting over stress to this certificate,

some do understand me please give me some moral support,

but some do not please don't blame me or even backstair me at the back,

maybe i'm sensitive? i hope so....

I know i'm too care of my result, i would like to change but i can't,

You all dunno I am having what kind of relative there,

You all dunno some words that they've spoke is really harsh and hurt my feeling,

I just like the others, I like to eat, I like to hang out with my dearest friends, I like to chui shui with my friends after school until late evening...AND I WANT TO ENJOY MY SWEET 17

But I have to controlled myself , because of them.... 

blah blah blah.

meanwhile, i scare to lose my friend and my school life

sigh

发疯

刚才简直就是气到想要哭了，
这种就叫做朋友，组员吗？
从刚开始担心车子没位坐，
叫爸爸去借部七人车子结果给他骂了一顿～
我为了把了100块的饥饿三十也给放弃了
结果现在，就是在出发前一天，
只有两个人去吧了～
我知道我很烂，组长当不好，
我也承认我并没有很尽力，
但是，这就是你们报复我的方法吗？
啊～我真的很想哭，
那种挫败感～

我真的想骂，吴秀玲，你真的是个废材！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！

芷蕊，谢谢你，你的坚持真的让我很感动

Something wrong with me recently

These few days, or few weeks,
me myself is stay in a humorsome situation~
What's Wrong with me
sorry i don't really know about it,
maybe i unable to cope with the changes---> lonely and friendless?
maybe influence by menstrual, instability of hormone secretion?
or maybe i too tension on my study~hmmm maybe

sorry,
i really hurt you all,
sorry i keep murmuring to all of you,
I really dunno wad happen to me,
now happy, now sad,
i dunno~
i think i going to be crazy
whoever i hurt before,
I would like to draw your attention here,
I'M SO SORRY TO ALL OF YOU

Desmond,
Thank you for always be my side,
sorry dear i know i hurt u deeply today,
I really don't want to see your reddish eyes hereafter,
I feel so guilty to you,
you so love me, you did all for me, you sacrificed your freedom, your time and so so on for me~
 but what I did is just hurt you and hurt you and hurt you,
really so heart sore when i see your reddish eyes,
really so heart sore when you are choke with sobs
in your eyes, full of tear but never drop,
I know you are trying to be tough in front me,
Sorry
I didn't act my role well,
I suppose to bring you happiness but not sad,
I suppose to let you laugh instead of crying,
dear i really so so so sorry,
nevertheless I love you

dfghjk

有时候，觉得自己什么都不是，
我得到很多，
也失去很多，
不是我不要去经营，
我只是不想把自己的想法，
强硬加给别人，
我不懂，
我错什么？
这是我的性格，
如果你觉得我变了的话
我只能说你从来没有了解我，
我笑并不代表我真的笑了，
哭了，也许是真正的解脱，
我什么都不是，
我是多余的。。。

speechless

I deleted someone i really hate,
actually i had the thought want to recover our broken friendship,
because so hard we only become best friends,
3 and more years really not easy to pass,
but once i read his blog,
all thought was gone on my mind,
and I regret to treated him as my trusted friend

Am I too over?

I did something quite over today, but it will never wrong,
that is the result what he deserved,
who's call him being to over to other,
so please do not blame anyone who treat u like this today,
since u were not treating us in a kind way....
and this was the result what u want,
I dunno why u can be so fake to other,
why you must only bully those "timid" one?
then when facing those "powerful" people you just keep your mouth and speak nothing acting like a coward there...
You Might think me were a timid person, so today i want to prove that I'm actually not.

Side topic,
today our Jyy Rui was fallen sick....
no comment on this,
she was too busy,
even spend time to eat also like a waste,
but anyhow Jyy Rui faster recover la.... not used to it be without u,
although today me and wen bin didn't quarrel at all,
but your exist will light up my world... lol
and today i so happy because u sent me the family request muackz

And the most touched 1 was,
today i received two tarts which from my 2 lovely laopo,
Distance keep us far apart, but my spirit is always be with you,
and I love u two....
maybe this recently i like keep myself from you,
because I just want to have my time, and do what i really want to do,
ya, revision~ and I knew that you are not really like,
actually i quite heart sore when my effort was nothing in front of you (Pei Yun) or you treat that as a sin,
but anything wrong being hardworking since the SPM is against the clock,
so i choosen not to find you, i know you will bored at me, because i keep discussing those topic which related to academy,
I just want to persuade my dream, that not a easy thing to success it,
I hope i can get more positive energy from u, pei yun instead being sarcastic.
It really hurt me.....sorry

today

Today i were read few articles which teacher called us to search so,
i admire she because she dare to pointed out the problem that's actually happen in our school,
and with a lots of  "powerful" evidences,
I wondering where she get the letters, but this not the main point,
the main point is,
i really feel disappointed toward my school,
and her opinions was really right,
i like the way that she being sarcastic.  
since they really knew what was the problem,
but why they don't solve it, or even make a try?
and today i only knew that the world is full of evil,
even the school that we usually called it as paradise,
actually before i reading the article i had heard something from my society member,
but i didn't taken much care of it, but until now, only i realize how big was the problem.
the problem not the way of coaching us(although it also a big problem), but the attitude that our authorities were ....
after today,I dunno how can I show my respect toward them some more,
And i also worrying my future, how can I keep surviving in my future working place, since there was so dark and full of evil.

i never do the same thing on my SPM

today happen a small matter, but it did influence my mood,
because I heard
someone said "although xiuling was 4th in the class, and I were just 20th, but our UEC results were same"
actually that time I felt wan to talk back,
but i stunned a moment,
actually nothing wrong as what he said,
ya i reli getting the same result with him,
and I was suck~
People is always care about the result and not your ass reason,
so I chosen keep myself quiet, don't make fool of myself

....
That was my option,
dated with him, and broke in the urgent time~
then getting sad and mad on this stupid thing,
influenced my exam mood,
and got a wonderful straight B's
stupid result

Since everyone are down looking me,
never mind i will prove myself in the next exam,
just wait and see....
i swear, I will stand on the stage and receive prize from anyone else of my SPM result,
it won't be the best, but at least get few A's
especially u, the ugly creation--"dop dop dop"-贱人-
I wan use my result to shut up ur big,thick,sausage mouth

so I will pause my dating during the period of taking SPM,
i don't one the same thing happen on me again and again,
phobia~
although he not as xx as him,
but I still need to do prevention,
I don't want to find reason for my result,
although it do reason for me, but it does to others

xiuling gambateh

happy cny, everybody

hehe, after tomorrow my happy cny holiday going to start,
sorry for didnt update my blog for so long long long and long time ar...
nothing chged much in this year,

but it does exists something worth to be happy

-my dearsest family stayed healthy and happy

-my sweet frenz were prettier and more handsome,
and my class was came in a new student, she called "shiok"

-i gain much in this happy new year, my dad gave me 1,000 ang pau and sponser1,200 for my new electronic dictionary, my lovely dad....awwwwwww

- and we both(me and desmond) were develop soomthly, stepping forward to 1 yr anniversary,
preparing suprise yarx

-"devil" was out of my life now ^_^Y






but it did exists unhappy thingy

-our class teacher had been chged, not bad,but getting tired for chging teacher none stop

-this year sitting for SPM, getting buzier

-me and shan wei d relationship was become worse

(blah, blah, blah, blah, blah......)

tomorrow midnight  going  depart to Thailand la....
To-do list,
1) buy two boxes of pork maggie (Thai la of coz) for my fatty miki
2)buy souvernir for my dearest frenz
   (1) the 14 doggie
   (2) hew yan,hew heng, ling kew, shiok, lewon, dian yi and hmmmmm ar yup!share hou ^^ and so on la
   (3)chee yung and his parents
  

*and last sorry for ling kew becoz ffk u so many times

-the end-

结束了

原来，
时间是可以冲淡一切～
当一个人不再爱你了，
泪水，已经不管用了。。。
我不需要你可怜，
我不需要你同情～
我过我的，你过你的,
我的心已经死了，
以前的种种，
现在对我来说，什么都不是了。。。

我已经傻了一次，
我不会让第二次发生～
没有就没有，
并没有什么大不了，
再说，我现在很幸福

Walao eh Walao eh

Just  now I went to make my new skul skirts,
F.... my butt 3x",
walao eh,
I dun care le,
I wan diet for serious d,
serious d,
anyways, my world is free carbon hydrate,starch,
no rice, no mee,
jux oni meat ,fruit and vegie~

LOH CHEE YUNG ar,
i warn u ar,
dun try to stop me ar,
dun say those "i like fat d, fat d gal oni can make me shiok","yerr, only me fat alone so unfair, I feel lonely no one accompany me"
i dun wan hear these phrase anymore ar!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!